It’s a big world out there when it comes to coaching. And there’s nothing that works my nerves more than seeing a friend or colleague fall prey to “coaches” who take advantage of people’s mental & financial vulnerabilities.
I’ve always been great at pattern recognition and being able to see straight through shiny sales pages, perfectly curated social media feeds, and hype jargon words that are regurgitated in order to manipulate people’s perception.
My intention with this post/guide is to empower you to ask the right qualifying questions, notice the red flags, and make the best decision for yourself that isn’t based in scarcity, fear, desperation, and deception.
Coaches cannot and will not give you all the answers and strategies you seek: that’s up to YOU to do the legwork, while your coach guides you by asking reflective questions and hold you accountable for your own goals.
The reality is that this industry is still wildly unregulated, so it’s up to you to do your due diligence since anyone can and will call themselves a coach.
Beware of Unsubstantiated Claims
Phrases like “achieve your goals in 4 weeks!” or “get 10x results!” are often used to create a false sense of urgency and FOMO which pressures potential clients to join. After all, they don’t want you to miss out on this “exclusive offer only available for the next week and there’s only 2 spots left”.
Coaches should be upfront about realistic timelines and outcomes based on individual goals, not make exaggerated generalized one-size-fits-all promises that only benefit the coach’s income, not you as a person.
Look for Coaching Certifications
While the school of hard knocks can definitely make for a great story and hero’s journey, it doesn’t make someone completely qualified to structure and lead a great coaching program.
The lack of formal coaching credentials is a red flag: it’s sooooo easy to hop onto Udemy, Skillshare, YouTube or other e-learning websites for a few hours to earn a digital “degree” or piece of paper with a random logo and your name on it. Some people even pay for a plug-and-play, copy-and-paste white-label program to then slap a coaching label to their socials claiming to be able to solve all your problems now. Please do your due diligence and research the sourcing of their training / education and do some digging online to determine the validity of the certification.
Watch for Ego and Hard Selling
Ethical coaches do not position themselves as gurus or experts above the client. They approach the relationship as equals and allow the client to drive the agenda. Beware of coaches who engage in hard selling tactics, high-pressure sales calls, or make you feel inadequate using gaslighting and condescending tones and manipulative phrases in order to convert you into a client and convince you that you won’t be successful without their guidance.
Listen for tone: if they clap back with defensiveness or a rude tone, that’s their ego talking, and your life has no room for someone else’s inflated ego to determine your outcome.
Verify Testimonials and Results
When evaluating a coach– be wary of generic, unverifiable testimonials. Don’t be afraid to ask the coach for specific case studies or client success stories you can actually follow up on and open a dialogue about in order to get the perspective from someone who actually went through the program.
Make sure when you follow up, to ask if they paid for the program or got it for free in order to help launch the program; ask how they found out about the program, ask if they had a personal relationship with the coach beforehand. Be skeptical of claims of transformative results using hype words without actual evidence to back those claims up. Be skeptical of programs and coaches who ONLY talk about the money and who fail to lay out the expectations of the coachee.
Be skeptical of coaches who’s websites are long-ass landing pages filled with sales psychology to draw you in without knowing the price. When their social media and website claim they have written for publications and have logos on their websites such as the Wall Street Journal, Huffington Post, Business Insider, etc; please ask for links to the actual article or podcast and not just take the logo on their site at face value. It’s easy to write a short and quick article just to be able to use that particular logo on your website.
Lack of Transparency Around Pricing and Packages
Ethical coaches should be upfront and transparent about their pricing, packages, and refund policies. Beware of coaches who are vague about costs, use high-pressure sales tactics, or try to upsell you into more expensive programs without clear justification. Or who tells you to take out a loan, credit card, or jump in without consulting with your significant other.
Overly Aggressive Marketing Tactics
Coaches who use aggressive marketing tactics like constant social media bombardment, email spam, or unsolicited direct messages are often more focused on acquiring new clients than serving their existing ones. Look for coaches who market themselves with authenticity and restraint. Coaches who use high-pressure sales tactics, like demanding an immediate decision during a sales call, are often more focused on making a quick sale than serving the client’s best interests. This aggressive marketing tactic can feel spammy and intrusive, with coaches using tactics like fake “live” videos, giveaways, and constant “special offers.”
Gut check yourself – more often than not, you’ll be able to feel if someone is authentic and actually invested in your growth.
Lack of Boundaries and Professionalism
A good coach maintains clear boundaries with clients and doesn’t try to become your new best friend or therapist. Red flags: coaches who are overly personal, demand excessive access to your time, or make you feel guilty for setting boundaries.
Lack of Customization
Effective coaches tailor their methodology to each individual client’s needs, goals, and learning style. Beware of a one-size-fits-all approach that doesn’t account for your unique circumstances. If you’re a neurodivergent person like I am, traditional coaching models and systems do NOT help; finding someone who is familiar with mannerisms of ADHD and being neurodivergent is an absolute must for me since I am not type A at all – I’ve tried dozens of programs and courses, and there aren’t many I’ve come across who cater to neurodivergent tendencies and habits.
Lack of Accountability and Follow-Up
Quality coaches provide ongoing support, check-ins, and accountability for their clients. If a coach is difficult to reach, doesn’t follow up, or leaves you feeling unsupported, that’s a major red flag.
Selling MLM or Recurring Revenue Products
Unethical coaches may try to recruit you into multi-level marketing (MLM) schemes or push you to sign up for expensive, ongoing “membership” programs with little transparency around the value provided. These types of products are designed to generate recurring revenue for them rather than truly serving you. Something else to lookout for is when a coach is selling a product with ‘Master Resell Rights’, meaning they are selling you a white label product you can then sell to other people. It seems like a good deal, but MRR products often neglect to be personalized and often come with restrictions and an initial high price tag. Basically: they want you to buy it to help recoup the costs they spent on the product. People calling themselves a ”coach” in the MLMs are running absolutely rampant, and they are only coaching you to recruit as a downline and will use skeezy marketing tactics to sell their product.
By exercising discernment and asking the right questions, you can identify coaches who are truly committed to your growth and development, versus those who are primarily interested in making a quick sale.
Here’s your arsenal of questions you can ask a “coach” to determine if their offering is the right fit:
- What are your coaching certifications and qualifications? When did you get certified? How long have you been practicing? (Make sure they invested in a program that when researched online, has verifiable and legit information)
- What is your former professional background and experience?
- What is your own personal growth and development routine?
- How many clients do you work with per year, and what is your client retention rate? (A coach who is overbooked or has high client turnover may not be able to provide personalized attention.)
- Can you provide references from past paying clients with no incentives or prior relationship I can speak with regarding your program?
- Can you provide full transparency around your pricing, packages, and refund policies? What is the total financial commitment, including any taxes, fees or other upcharges?
- What other products / offerings do you have available?
- What happens if I’m not satisfied with the coaching services and want a refund?
- What is your availability and communication style?
- What timelines do you typically work with and what are the expected outcomes?
- How often do you connect with clients, and through what communication channels?
- What is your specific area of expertise, and how does it align with my goals?
- Can you provide a sample coaching session or trial period so I can experience your approach firsthand?
- Are YOU the one doing the coaching and onboarding calls, or will it be delegated out to another person?
- What is your policy on client confidentiality and privacy?
- What is your process for onboarding new clients, and what systems do you use?
- Can you provide details on the specific tools, resources, and materials you use with clients?
- Do you require people to sign a non-disclosure agreement (NDA)? (this means you legally cannot write or say anything negative about the program and give honest feedback if it’s not what you thought it was; it protects the “coach” and gives them leverage to sue you for speaking up)
- How do you measure and track client success and goals?
- What is your coaching methodology and how is it customized for each client, especially when working in a group setting?
- Can you share examples / cases of how you’ve helped clients with challenges similar to mine?
- Can you share examples on how you’ve had to adapt your coaching style to different client personalities and learning styles?
- How do you handle client setbacks or lack of progress?
- What is your process for helping clients overcome mental blocks, limiting beliefs, or emotional barriers? (Coaching should address mindset as well as skills.)
- What is your process for working with and managing clients who are ADHD, neurodivergent, and autistic and don’t do well with the typical structure and type A stuff?
- What are the links to your social media accounts?
- Are you a part of any organizations, boards, associations, or other memberships?
- Do you have any affiliations, partnerships, or financial interests that could influence your recommendations?
- Are you currently involved with a MLM or other program requiring recruits for you to keep a rank or minimum company requirements?
- What are your top 3 recommended books, YouTube Channels, and Podcasts for this industry?
- What publications, podcasts, or channels have you contributed to and collaborated with?
- What are your biggest pet peeves in this industry?
- Have you ever operated as a coach under a different business name?
Let’s use these questions and informed details to cultivate better discernment for our decision-making skills. Don’t fall prey to the common sales and psychological tactics meant to strip you of your financial autonomy. You got this!
